The Yami
by Drake Clawfang
Summary: Pointless oneshot. Marik, Bakura, Yami, Darek, Roslyn, Teana, Seth...ever wonder where all these alteregos come from? A Tribute to the Yamis of Yugioh.


**A Tribute to all the evil alter-egos of Yugioh.**

The Yami

"Hey guys!" Joey said, walking into Yugi's living room. Yugi, Yami, Bakura, Ryou, Marik, Malik, Téa, Teana, Tristan, Drake, Darek, Rochelle and Roslyn were sitting around the room. "What's on the tube?" Joey asked, squeezing in between Marik and Bakura.

"Check this out." Yami said, flipping the channel. "It's that Capsule Monsters movie we shot a while back."

"Oh yeah, I remember that." Téa said. "How did it end again?"

"It's one of the last episodes now." Rochelle muttered.

"Turn it up!" Ryou said. Yami did so, and they listened intently.

"Wait a minute." Drake mused. "So, Alexander the Great once owned the Millennium Ring?" Everyone turned to stare at Bakura. Bakura shrugged.

"I recall someone by that name a couple millenniums ago." He replied.

"That's not right." Malik protested. "It said he got his soul split in half! How come none of us had that happen?"

"Well, our Yamis came with our Millennium Items, he didn't get to keep his, I'm sure it's allowed." Yugi explained.

"It gets better." Yami said, flipping the channel again. "See this? It's our spin-off, Yugioh GX. Check out that guy." Yami pointed to a purple-eyed man in a long white coat.

"Looks kinda like Dartz." Tristan said.

"He's called Sartorius, and he got hit by this wave of energy from space called the Light of Ruin, and he got an evil side too." Yami explained.

"Him too?" Darek growled.

"That doesn't count, his Yami was caused by space energy, we got ours from the Shadow Realm and the like." Rochelle piqued up.

"Not just him, this guy Aster here, his guardian killed his dad because he got hit by that Light too, so he's also got a Yami." Yami said.

"I thought his dad was kidnapped." Joey said.

"No, that's just how they dubbed our show when they released in over in North America." Yugi replied. Darek looked up.

"So let's see here…there's me, Marik, Bakura, Yami, Sartorius, that guy's guardian."

"His name is DD." Yami told him.

"Sounds like a bra size." Marik snickered.

"Okay, DD, and…"

"Don't forget us!" Teana said, raising her hand and pointing to Roslyn.

"Well you two and Darek are just OCs, do you really count?" Tristan pointed out.

"Okay, Marik, Bakura, Alexander, Yugi, honorable mentions of myself, Teana and Roslyn…" Darek said. "That's 7, plus Sartorius and DD. Damn, where did we all come from?" Yami shrugged and flipped the station.

"Yes, you've seen them all on TV! Evil alter-egos who want to take over the world are the latest trend, and I know you don't want to be left out!" The man on the infomercial laughed. Everyone stared.

"Shadi?" Yugi gasped. Shadi smiled.

"The Yami is the latest craze among kids today! Comes complete with evil, warped sense of humor, power-hungry personality, as well as a different hairstyle and voice from the hikari, you!" Shadi said. "Order your Yami today for only 999999.99$! Taxes are not included. The Yami, buy yours today!" The infomercial ended as everyone stared in shock.

"Oh my god…" Bakura groaned. "He's selling us!"

"Damn those producers! I'm not some sort of ancient prostitute! That's it, I'm canceling my cameo in GX Season 3." Yami grumbled, whipping out his cellphone.

"Now calm down guys." Téa said. "They're over a million bucks, who can afford one?" Suddenly, the front door opened, and Seto and Mokuba Kaiba walked in.

"What are you doing here Kaiba?" Drake asked. Kaiba rolled his eyes.

"Seto wanted to show you guys what I ordered for him on television!" Mokuba explained. "Check it out!" Behind Kaiba walked in another young man. Like Kaiba, he had blue eyes and brown hair, but his hair was spiked, not slicked. He had on a black trenchcoat over dark-blue jeans and a shirt.

"Kaiba?" Yugi blinked.

"Close. Call me Seth." The new guy grinned. "I'm Kaiba's new Yami." Everyone let out a groan. "Hey, you guys wanna grab a bite?" Seth asked.

"Why are you nice?" Joey asked. Seth shrugged.

"I'm not evil, I'm just the opposite of Kaiba, ie, fun. All Hikaris and Yamis are welcome to a feast at the Kaiba Mansion!" He cried. Everyone cheered and ran outside to pile into Kaiba's limo.

"Can't you hear?" Marik growled, shoving Joey, Mokuba and Tristan out of the limo. "Hikaris and Yamis only." The limo door closed and the lot drove off.

"This stinks." Tristan groaned. Suddenly a second limo pulled up, and the door opened.

"Joey Wheeler?" The man asked. "This is for you. We wanted this one in the last season of the series, but the shipment came late. Here." A young blonde man in a white tunic stepped out the limo and helped Joey to his feet.

"Hi, I'm Jono, your Yami." He introduced. Joey grinned.

"Awesome!" Taxi he hailed. A cab stopped, and Joey and Jono jumped in. "Kaiba Mansion." Joey said as the cab sped off. Left standing in the street were Tristan and Mokuba.

"Don't suppose you've cashed any million dollar checks recently?" Mokuba asked.

"Nope. You?"

"Seto takes all the cash." Mokuba sighed. Tristan nodded and took out his cellphone.

"Who you calling?" Mokuba asked.

"The bank, I need a loan." Tristan grumbled. "I will not be the only member of the gang without a Yami!" He stomped off down the street, leaving Mokuba standing there.

"What about me?" He protested, holding up his hands.

"You appear in GX, you'll be fine!" Tristan called. Mokuba thought for a moment, and smiled.

"Yeah, I do…cool!"


End file.
